Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Good-bye 2015

I am one of those people who might make resolutions at the start of a new calendar year, or might make them at the start of my new year on my birthday, or might not make any and be fine with that.  When I have made them, they aren't any kind of organized list, but more like some general things I need to change or work on.

These last couple days I've been feeling somewhat reflective.  Maybe it's the post-Christmas quiet.  Maybe it was all the time I had in the car yesterday when we experienced our first snow/ice storm and people lost their minds on the roads, which resulted in absurd traffic problems.  Not sure what's up, but I am thinking that maybe making a couple changes might help.  Conversely,  there are also things I'm not going to change (like using too many words when I write and talking about cats all the time).

Most of what has brought me to this place is sleep deprivation.  For a long time, one of my cats has been having a tough time getting through the night without waking me up 2, 3, 4+ times.  It reached a point where I nearly couldn't function each day from being so sleep deprived.  And I am not exaggerating - I wasn't sleeping more than 2 hours at a time all night then working all day.  I was dragging myself through every day just waiting to get into bed, yet dreading it because I knew she'd start with the waking me up crap.  Finally, I tried some behavior modification then met with her vet.  She is improving and we're down to (generally) 1 or 2 wake-ups each night.  I'm still not getting enough uninterrupted sleep, but there is progress.

Because I am always so tired, I've cut back on exercising, which is something I very much enjoy.  When I can drag myself out of bed, I'll go down to our basement at 5 a.m. and row.  I really love it - and my day is always better when I start that way.  I am going to make more of an effort to get myself up, no matter how tired I am, and start each day in a way that ultimately makes me happy.

I've also been just wading through my days without taking enjoyment from things the way I want to.  I have so many blessings, yet I'm not fully embracing what I have -- again -- because  I am exhausted.  I promise to step back and appreciate what's right in front of me.

The other thing I'm going to do is find some photo challenges (and I'm going to invited my photo-taking friends to join in).  Looking for specific things to photograph a couple times a week or on weekends will be fun and it will get me outside during the icky winter months.  It will be even better if I'm doing the challenge with others.

And that's it.  I am ready for 2016. 

If you think you don't need to take a look at how things are every now and again, I say to you, give yourself a mental checkup once in a while - it will be good for your soul.

Happy New Year friends xo


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